Dueling Decades
June 2, 2021

Teenage Dirtbag Brendan B. Brown of Wheatus tells us who had the worst May 1979, 1989 or 1999!


Hello again, fellow Duelers! Before we get into this week's episode notes. We wanted to remind you that we're now on YouTube! If you weren't aware, your favorite retro battleground is now on video. Matter of fact, some episodes are "taped live with a studio audience", so please go and subscribe (https://www.youtube.com/c/duelingdecades). We hope to see you in the chat! Anyways, we got another good one for you this week! Well, a bad one? I suppose it depends on how you look at it, but we're back with another "Worst of May" match-up! This week, we're joined by the amazing frontman of the band Wheatus, Brendan B. Brown! Brendan tossed some teenage dirtbag out of his chair, grabbed the gavel, and he was ready to judge these contestants: First up, from parts kinda known, Joe Findlay digs deep, and brings us the worst May 1979 has to offer. Next up, straight from a late-night Round House screening, Marc James brings a double deuce of picks from, May 1989. Finally, rounding out the competition, the man voted most likely to not wear JNCOs, Mancrush delivers the worst of May 1999!

Stick around after the competition for a campfire chat with Brendan, AND a live rendition of "Teenage Dirtbag" that will give you chills. In this episode, you might hear something about dirty judges, a boat that should have sank, young republicans that Brendan doesn't buy, Marvel tries again, a ship that DOES sink, models taking dumps, Jim West is not a rapper, 28-minute songs, sweaty cocaine music, television murders, assassinations and riots, the tale of the hero sausage, an operation you never played, Japanese stuff, worthless toys that caused a commotion, and just what is the story behind Teenage Dirtbag anyway?! All this week and more!

 

Do you agree with Brendan's rulings? Look for us tonight at 9pmEST with our friend Judge David Schultz on YouTube!

 

Please don't forget to subscribe and review! Want to share some of your own 1980s & 1990s memories? Join the other thousands of people in our Facebook group and get more original nostalgic content every day! If you're into the 1960s & 1970s, join our other group! Links below:

 

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Transcript

this is podcast new york what's up dueling decades this is wax peace to all you guys and uh thanks for having me on the show will it be the 90s or the 80s beanie babies or crack babies will it be nirvana or madonna maybe britney maybe whitney do you like new metal a new wave dave grohl or super dave i don't know but now the battle begins dueling decades let's see who wins

mark broadcasting live from the podcast new york studios it's another all new dueling decades the adult-only retro game show were the decades battle for supremacy because it's your history we just fight for it i am mark james and this week we have for you a worst month duel i'll be representing the worst of may 1989 alongside the other duelers and the decades they will be fighting for first off is a man who did it all for the nookie say hello to man crush what's up that's right i got uh the worst the worst of may 1999 you know what i'm so happy about too we have a musician that's on this week whose first name is not chris i just realized this like we have krista makes chris blue uh chris baron and i think there was another one too like so i'm happy that we don't have a chris but if i call you chris no offense by it you can call me chris baloo all day

also joining us on the panel is the media king of the north please welcome back joe finley that's right ladies and gentlemen back by popular demand my demand not yours i got the worst in 1979 and it's pretty damn bad and as always here on the show we need somebody to adjudicate all of this awesomeness so this week's guest judge is the vocalist guitarist and founding member of wedis you can catch them on tour this summer with everclear living color and hubba stink all rise for judge brendan b brown

yeah you know what we forgot to tell brendan this brendan this is a worst of episode so you actually have to pick the worst pick from each round you know okay so that's what that's what i need to focus on is what's terrible yeah however you want to pick it it's up to you you're the judge okay all right i am i i feel like i need an explanation of this media king of the north tag that's like i am the tech way north yeah i'm the technical producer and i'm canadian and they like to butter me up okay we can't pay him well so no that's what we do so you pay in titles i see it yeah it's still the best still the best money i make

ladies and gentlemen the following contest will be held under dueling decades rules a judge's coin flip shall decide who picks first out of the five dueling decades categories movies television music news and hut products a judge's ruling will determine who wins each round allowing the victor to choose the next available category the first three rounds are worth one point each with rounds four and five worth two points a piece and in the event of a tie after all five rounds we'll go to a final wild card round remember duelers to review the show like subscribe and play along at home it's time for more dueling decades let's go right over to our guest judge for this episode brendan b brown for the coin toss this week it'll be between man crush and joe finley okay so here we go this is heads right here the dunlop pick and this is tails nothing okay you do it nothing makes me feel more nothing than nothing so let's go with it let's go here we go kids

oh tails nothing is something today baby

all right joe finley you win the coin toss you take control the board and you get to select our first category uh i was kind of hoping i'd lose so i didn't have to do this part uh all right uh let us start with tv yes that's where i would have gone joe i like it a lot of garbage to choose from okay so i give you on may 10 1979 i give you the premiere of his honor this is a show starring david huddleston you might know him the best as the real jeffrey lebowski in the big lebowski or the big lebowski uh he plays the mayor who lives at home with his daughter who's a civil rights attorney and his son who's a hippie and that's all there is to it uh the daughter's played by kathy cronkite which is actually walter cronkite's daughter and will seltzer who was uh if you know for 80s fans would know him as the creepy guy chasing down fred savage in the wizard uh so basically the idea is this is the mayor he's going through mayoral things but for whatever reason his very successful daughter still lives with him as does his hippie son and whenever he gets really frustrated in his day he breaks out into song that's right folks this old man mare has a musical number in every single episode what but be very happy because there were only seven of us of these episodes it began in may it ended in june uh the show was actually the result of a desperate attempt from the nbc president who was just newly appointed uh to get some new life because they were in distant last which is a hard thing when there's only three networks rocking and uh so they put in a bunch of mid-season stuff there was actually in total between the three networks there were 36 brand new shows in the mid-season and this was the kind of quality we were putting out uh so you know in the end this is relegated to the death spin of history his honor may 10th 1979.

all right man crush what did you bring for the television round well let's fast forward 20 years which i really like that we're all 10 years apart this is nice and simple the last couple weeks we've been trying to do this and i think it makes for a lot better of a competition when you have that decade apart from each other but let's go to may 21st of 1999 and honestly like i don't know if this is a good pick or a bad pick because it's the final episode of a horrendous reboot so even back in the 1990s we're getting force-fed reboots although i think the problem now is that all of these reboots are typically mainstream so you want to reboot a macgyver great that's going straight to cbs back in the 90s at least they tried to hide these reboots a little bit this show it happened to be distributed by cbs but they stashed it on upn where no one would see it which is pretty nice like i've i always have to watch my picks just so i get a feel for what i'm talking about since clearly i've never watched this show when it was on television luckily i was able to find it on youtube last night or actually maybe i'm not so lucky because i'll never get that time back but have you ever said to yourself man what happened to robert urich and jones severance

me either i never said that either but if you did this show is what happened to them sadly of course robert urich he passed away a couple years after the show ended in 2002 and sadly so did joe and severance's career during this 25 episode run they did have some really notable names as passengers on the ship you had jessica alba curtis armstrong rue mcclanahan c thomas howell danica mckellar kevin nash jerry springer lark voorhees adrian barbeau billy ray cyrus robin givens and even [ __ ] alf was on this show however none of those folks or the original cast of the uh the legendary original could stop this ship from sinking into the abyss and uh for the well-being of our listeners i wasted three hours of my own life to watch this totally unfunny nightmare of a reboot so do yourself a favor and do not bother to watch loveboat the next wave i like i'd honestly rather watch my movie selection on repeat for 24 hours than ever watch a second of this show ever again totally unfunny like i had to pay attention so hard to figure out what was going on because the story there's too many stories it's just [ __ ] it is a [ __ ] show but yeah it's a love boat the next wave with robert urich and jones severance count me in all right guys from my television selection i uh i actually went with the ending of a very good show that just didn't end so great uh so let's go to may 14 1989 for the series finale of family ties nobody likes to say goodbye this episode is entitled alex doesn't live here anymore it's season 7 episode 26 alex packs his belongings for a move to new york city for a job with an investment firm now each family member has a chance to say goodbye to alex in this episode nick and skippy even show up to help alex pack his bags and his ex-girlfriend lauren played by the lovely courtney cox she brings a gift over to alex to say goodbye as well so alex states in the episode that his new job is going to pay him 75 000 a year in new york city now when ingested for inflation that amount equates to roughly about sixty one thousand and five hundred dollars in 2021 so uh i don't know what the cost of living is in downtown manhattan but i don't know if 161 000 is going to cover that one well i mean i lived in lower manhattan i know what goes on and i can say that back then that would have been a chunk of change you could have got away with something that was uh you know i lived on the lower east side avenue being 14th street um you know it wasn't the neighborhood my mother wanted me to live in but i could afford it you know on my on my less than alex p keaton salary circa 96 so you know so uh stephen's fatherly advice to alex uh before he finally leaves is in this episode is don't lose your passion and more importantly don't lose your keys and just like all loving family members do when a member is getting ready to leave the house the girls and steven each measure alex's room to see how much more space they will have once he leaves the house now 36.3 million people said goodbye to the beloved kings family that night so let's take a look at what they were saying in the newspapers we went over to the akron beacon journal may 12 1989 for a headline that says family ties going out at length but not in style when family ties ends and ends at seven season runs sunday night with a special hour episode nbc will reward the comedy with an unprecedented honor a 10 extra minutes in prime time so the cast can take a final bow and say goodbye to make up for this self-indulgent spectacle the network is actually pushing back the start of its movie ferris bueller's day off to 9 10. so let's maintain some manner of perspective the article says family ties has always been a fun half hour but there is no need for to for this manipulative piece of emotional grandstanding he says he then goes on to talk about all the other great shows that never got the courtesy that family ties is getting with the extra 10 minutes he says nbc is qui uh nbc's family ties is quite enjoyable hardly is earned mentioned with the select rank of company of all the other classics uh now we're not saying goodbye to anything more tonight than a reasonably good series nbc scans pink nbc's campaign of overrating family ties tarnishes its legacy and is in is and is as embarrassing as the weepy 10 minute so long it's been good good to know you exercise so the guy even ends this article crediting family ties success all to being in the one place you never want to be right behind bill cosby so that's what i got for the final for my pick of the worst of may 1989 it's the final episode of family ties as we say goodbye to the alex p keaton show you know what's funny though like out of that whole thing you described the whole episode the only thing i remember from that final episode because we watched that was that bow at the end yeah and it's total [ __ ] that he made that because he was a poli-sci major in college so he did not come out of college making was it 75 grand yeah 75 000 that's poor research on the side of now it's interesting that was the only thing you mentioned was the bow because they completely cut that out of the episode when it went to syndication so oh well makes sense all right so let's throw it over to brendan b brown our judge for this evening for the ruling on the television round all right first of all i didn't anticipate getting nauseous this is ridiculous um kind of [ __ ] you guys for these choices first of all but also um you know you expected total dog [ __ ] out of the late 90s and the late 70s were not even close to better with the exception of uh you know all in the family or uh good times those were those were okay but you i didn't even know about his aunt that's i like that one i missed that it struck me as it sounded like it was kind of a cross between uh night court and the heat of in the heat of the night but a total miss on both fronts in in every way um wasn't there a singing another singing court show after that there was cop rock cop rock oh jesus they just sang everywhere so they did the interesting part i guess is that they didn't give up on this idea that's amazing um randy newman yeah so so but also uh love boat was never my speed right that was a you know i thought that show sucked when i was a kid i thought that was the worst like garbage the first one that everyone sort of venerates these days right um i was way into a show called the phoenix with judson scott and like other weird stuff the airwolf you know i was really r star blazers uh cartoon but that said i was tempted to go knives out on loveboat until you mentioned this disgrace of family ties thing this is really i i am like i might hang up on you guys like so so okay first of all the premise of the hippie parents who used to be activists and now they're [ __ ] reagan you know people blue dog whatever like and their kid is is i love i look michael j fox is one of my favorite people to look up to from the 80s for lots of reasons for frighteners for light of day with joan jett like all this really cool stuff that he did teen wolf there's others like we could go down to michael j fox rabbit hole somehow he is insulated from the drakenshmuts of you know this family ties which i never bought as a kid because i didn't buy the whole like oh the hippies have like stockbroker son you know like that just i you know something about it was like um also was a little too close to home because i was like that i was going through heights i was a i was a junior in high school or about to become a junior in high school in 1989 so there was and i was in a uh catholic college prep school that you commuted to on the way to new york city to like that so it was all way too close to home for me to alex b keaton trip but and all i wanted to do was play guitar and piss every adult off that you know i could find but um i'm gonna go with i'm surprised here but i'm going with the family ties that that is that's horrific you expect terrible things from the 70s and you expect terrible things from the late 90s but this is you found a real a real turd and i'm shocked out of all of the stuff you you named from michael j fox and you did not name back to the future well i i mean what we all know we two mainstream how great that is like that's the greatest tr triplex like sit sit and watch all three of them oh yeah you know i mean i do it once a year with my friend james bourne from the group busted and you know we do we're like listening like a watching party like just you have to watch all three it's the greatest uh you know trilogy it really is for me it's the only one that makes sense where none of them suck i don't think any of them suck so you know i'll fight about that but yeah um you know i like the passion this is gonna go well by round five all right guys so i won the first round i pick up the first point and more importantly i get to i get to take control of the board uh we're gonna go to the movies round for round number two

all right we're ready for the for the pick toss

good all right for my worst of may movie i actually picked a tv movie now last week man crush picked the 1988 tv movie the incredible hulk returns now if you've not listened to that episode yet go back and check that one out on our youtube page the links down below in the show notes now in man crush's pick he told us that the movie was supposed to be a vessel for a thor spin-off that just unfortunately never got made well the very next year they tried it again airing may 7 1989 nbc gave us the atrocity that is the trial of the incredible hulk when banner tries to stop a death wish like rape on a subway he turns into the hulk kicks everyone's ass passes out and then when he comes to he's the one that's being sent to jail and accused of being the attacker now the thugs that were doing the attacking well of course they're linked to the great marvel villain the kingpin so bruce banner gets a uh gets help from a lawyer named matt murdock who also happens to be of course daredevil now despite the title the hulk never actually goes on trial and you know but wait mark i've seen the clips of the hulk like hulking out in the courtroom and that's the artwork on the box well that scene that's actually a flash that's actually a dream sequence that banner has while he's in prison yes i said prison so the film should have actually been called the hulk goes to jail but i think that would have been a little bit more of a downer so so this is the only time in the history of the incredible hulk live action show and of the three movies they made where the hulk wears his purple trademark shorts it happens in that dream sequence so this also marks marks the first live action appearance of daredevil and his nemesis kingpin who actually in this one has a ponytail and a beard and is never actually called the kingpin and you guessed it that spin-off show it never got made either so i give you the trial of the incredible hulk aka the hulk goes to jail may 7th 1989. i almost watched that the other night because it's actually i did don't do it they want to it is available on prime you can if you have prime you can go and watch that it's on the list you actually go back to back yeah watch the return and then watch the trial and see uh well the storylines do do kind of link up there so that's great how the hell can you put the hulk in jail carefully what you know what creeps me out is the fact that they keep changing his name he's you know it's david bruce banner it was bruce banner and then they changed it to david banner because the directors of the movie didn't like a name that has two of the same letters in it so that's stanley's whole thing what brendan's like wait a minute wait hold up hold up so was was it was it bill bixby who played who was the original yes yeah so david big spray let me get this straight they they re-kicked it the same first letter of both his names right they went to the trouble of recasting him what five years later 10 years later how long how much later it ended in 82 the original the [ __ ] okay so that's that's a in tv life that's like a decade so so they went through the trouble of getting him back involved and then they were like no no to the original your name is muhammad now this does not bode well see i i loved the original hulk series lived for it as a kid it was such a big deal me and my brother tv you know that was like back then that was like one of very few television shows besides the muppets maybe that we were allowed to watch on tv at night so you know big deal totally big deal duke's a hazard too was the other i don't know for me at least it was like yeah i wasn't as into the dukes you know i'm a i'm a real you all i'm i'm from new york but like dude we have three channels i know i don't know that's true you get i i i was really into um i was really into good times when i was a kid i always watched that when i come home from school um that's probably the worst of episode i'll tell you there was not a whole lot of good times on good times i know i know i remember that show was done all night yeah but the first time i ever like was affected by uh something dramatic on television was when the father died that episode rocked my because it was all fun and games and then suddenly it was like yeah he's not coming home and i i was i had to like hide under the bed like it was bad it was really bad intense and that's like 70s too right that was when he died that was late 70s 70s are dark time dark times dark times real real real all right joe finley what did you bring for the movies round well thanks for asking mark um we've already talked about a boat that was a bad choice in this so let's bring up another one uh this movie was directed by irwin irwin allen who you know uh produced the towering inferno poseidon adventure swiss family robinson lost in space big into the disaster kind of things and it starred a couple of oscar winners i give you a sequel nobody asked for beyond the poseidon adventure starring michael kane sally field telly savalas peter boyle slim pickens and shirley jones the plot is really simple the ss poseidon's still capsized uh greek rescuers get the sos and they show up a little late but they decide to go into the hole that everybody escaped from in the first one and look for survivors only to have that whole collapse on them and now they're trapped uh during their travels around the boat they find a bunch of people that didn't get found the first time apparently and uh they all have to find their way out together the film you recycle the set is it the same no this is what's crazy so the producer produced or the director of this movie produced that movie and this movie just looks like an all-around cheap version just cheap cheaply painted sets and it looks like a tv version tv movie version of the whole thing the movie has a zero percent approval rating on rotten tomatoes and variety wrote that the film comes off as a virtual remake of the 1972 original without the film's mounting suspense or excitement jean siskel said that it's virtually the same story as the original disaster film with shoddily painted sets tiny studio created fires all the exact same size and dialogue that could be written by a first grader the movie only made back 20 percent of its 10 million dollar budget and uh just as an interesting thing too so the bad movie but was it the bad time came out the same day as alien so that was its competition and the re-release of jaws so that's what it had to go up against and that's what it gave you for your uh efforts to go to see it so once again may 25th 1979 beyond the poseidon adventure man all right man crush over to you for the movies round uh first uh stacy lanigan is in our chat has stacey and stacy says that mark looks physically pained by his choice and i would agree but i think mine i think mine is worse i i do think that let's go uh may 14th of 1999. first like i have to acknowledge here this is a bit of a circle back to a previous worst of episode that we did last july diane franklin was the judge and i believe this was the episode where i came to the news round with a story about joey buttafuco was packing up his family and heading to los angeles or hollywood to launch his acting career do you remember this episode mark i do very well i think i won i think i won that round uh it was the worst of episode uh lo and behold it appears his dreams had come true because it i happened to land on the month where he finally was in a movie that hit theaters all right don't get too excited for joey though one it's joey [ __ ] buttafuco and two this movie made a whopping 856 dollars at the box office uh dave schultz i hope you're in the chat uh you'll like this one it made 1372 inflation in 2021 big numbers here so i'm not sure this is what he envisioned for himself when he took his uh this trek with his family across the country but anyway this movie right here it was created by vince offer and perhaps that name doesn't ring a bell with people but you probably would recognize some of the products that he was slinging on infomercials vince offer would be the same guy you'd probably know as the shamwow guy the slap chop guy and more recently the crank chop guy uh i have not seen those infomercials i don't watch them with tv anymore but after spending 200 nearly 200 000 of his own money on this pile of dog [ __ ] he went bankrupt after a couple years it had like a delayed release came out on may the 14th and just kind of like hovered and didn't do anything but before heading back to uh the flea markets to do uh slap shop sales offer ended up suing anna nicole smith for four million dollars because apparently she refused to do the movie which she agreed to be in and then was like now there's a pile of dog [ __ ] i'm not doing it so uh he tried to sue her he didn't win that one but before the movie even came out he tried to sue the fairly brothers and 20th century fox for allegedly stealing 14 scenes from this movie and using them in their something about mary not only did he lose that lawsuit but he also had to pay nearly 70 000 in attorney's fees to 20th century fox so that's too weird to be false yeah dude if you watch this i'll get into some like things about this movie he they didn't steal [ __ ] from this movie trust me allegedly this movie sold 100 000 copies on dvd and i'm having a hard ass time finding like i had a hard time finding this movie to watch i would venture to say that is a erroneous figure i was talking to our boy eric one of our patreons last night and i told him uh he sent us a couple messages we were talking about movies and i was like dude i gotta go hunt for this movie now i gotta let you go and it actually took me hours to find and i didn't even get to watch it last night and watch my i watched that shitty love boat instead i didn't even get to watch it till today and this movie is [ __ ] horrible but on top of that i found two reviews usually when when you i can't find a movie i'll go to youtube and say all right let's see what people did on this movie let's see if anybody reviewed this thing i found two two reviews and one of those reviews is the absolute creepiest review of a movie i have ever seen in my life i'm not gonna go into too much detail here but if you go and you look up the name of this movie and review after i tell it to you and you go watch this [ __ ] your skin will crawl listen to this guy and the things that he likes about this movie it's crazy anyhow if you're in the movie or if you're in the mood to never land laugh once horrible cover songs batman batman decapitating grandma necrophilia the adventures of a walking vertical smiles excess fake ejaculations models taking dumps robbing sperm banks joey buttafuco virgin hunters bag lady bikini pageants hosted by slash yes that slash baywatch parodies flirty harry lorena bobcut and wondering how the hell this guy cast michael clark duncan in three [ __ ] scenes then go out and try to find a copy of the underground comedy movie but before you do that go and find that guy's review first because you're gonna be like what the

wow that sounds absolutely atrocious it is but let's hear what our judge for this episode brendan b brown has to say on the movies round my teeth are vibrating i really didn't think i was going to hate you guys this much and i really [ __ ] hate you oh one more one more thing about that this is the most dialogue i have heard out of slash in my entire life i know i was going to say i've i i heard him talk in an interview once or twice but he's like a man of don't play guitar a lot a lot of words i was like what i didn't even think it was him at first i had to go check imdb it's him so uh well you want me to recap and just what that's just because i feel like i need to climb out of a grave um so so okay so i'm not gonna go anywhere near [ __ ] on bill bixby okay because too many fond memories a wonderful show lou ferrig no come on like it's it's so it's so good was lou ferrigno he was in the he was in this remake right okay so no way am i gonna like and he was bigger i don't care if it all right exactly i don't care if it was a failure and they screwed up the whole concept of superheroes you know i don't give a [ __ ] like those guys they have oh too much goodwill but um you had me close on this poseidon reboot the poseidon poseidon you know um uh but then you said that telly cevallos and michael kane were in it and i'm not i'm not about to do you know be down on kojak and like i mean come on like i'm not gonna i'm not gonna be mad with these people also came out the same day as alien uh by the way anecdotal story my father had an illegal cable box uh in the early 80s the kind that like if it got scrambled you switched it over with a giant thing and uh one day it wasn't working so my mom called the cable company to come and repair it and we lost that cinemax in 1982 or whatever it was and you know my father had watched alien and come downstairs and got in my face and said you're never allowed to watch that [ __ ] movie you understand me like like it was it was so traumatic right such a big deal and of course that that made me know that i would go and watch it as soon as i possibly could but my mom called the cable guy and away my dreams of watching alien went so um i'm gonna have to say that the joey butterfucko thing every single word that you said everything i don't even remember like i stopped listening after a while and i was like this is just he made this all up to make everybody upset i didn't it's real and actually that's what it says it's guaran this movie says it's guaranteed to offend and it tries really hard to do that if i could just get this straight are you telling me that joey buttafuco did he star in a movie of himself going to hollywood to make it as an actor does that mean no no so last year we had this episode with diane franklin it was another worst of episode and she was a judge and it was the news round and i found a news story it was about i don't remember what year was i think it was 1996 and it was about joey picking up packing everything leaving new york and uh heading to hollywood to start a new career and that was my news story for that uh for that episode so it's not so there it's okay so what was the dvd that you were seeking oh so it was this movie it was uh the underground comedy movie right okay i i i misheard you at first and thought that there was a movie that joey butterfucker starred in about joey butterfucko going to hollywood okay now that that made me laugh i puked a little bit and and then i was mad at you so the rage like clouded my listening so i'm gonna go with this whatever the news story was that is like it still sucks underground comedy movie yeah the underground comedy movie is fired we're doing that one that's the worst you win before anybody goes and tries to watch that please go and watch that dudes you i wanted him to get like a youtube number of spikes i don't know like i think it was years ago this guy did it but it's frightening if you watch that and side note uh brendan i don't know if any of you guys remember this story from back in the day because i also had a black box but ours was in the early 90s and there was a story that circulated back then i think it was true actually so what they did with the black box was you would go to watch the disney channel right and it would be cinderella well instead of cinderella being on they would send a different feed to all these people that had the black box with the cinderella porno on it so they would wait for these how these homes to call the cable company and go what the [ __ ] are you playing on disney channel right now the dwarfs are [ __ ] cinderella like what is going on and they would get busted for it i don't know if it was true or not but that was like the fable that was going around in the early 90s you guys never heard that or did i just did i dream no but i can tell you plenty of stories about porno being put on children's television as somebody who works at children's television

that has that does happen

all right so i i didn't think it could be any further horrified but you've really proved me wrong that's what we did what we tried to do all right man crush will you pick up a point and we're heading into our final one point round you have control of the board what category are we going with next all right so i i'm gonna play a little bit of uh yeah i just because i don't know what brent's gonna go with this i'm gonna go music with a one point round all right

all right so let's go may 4th 1999 and here is one of the most annoying and overplayed songs of 1999 and it's all rooted to an abysmal flop of a movie uh a little story here so there was a producer named john peters and all john ever wanted out of life was a giant spider in a movie he failed to get that giant spider in the aborted nicholas cage superman movie but he never gave up hope and at the same time you had will smith and will was like the creme de la creme of hollywood at the time basically anything will did turn to gold fresh prince bad boys independence day men in black massive massive hits then he turns down the role of neo in the matrix and signs on to do this giant spider flick that i'm talking about so and matter of fact will smith would call this the worst decision of his career his own mother was quoted as saying will you could have done better all right so keep in mind they've been planning this movie for quite a while like several years probably like most of the decade because mostly like the western movies that were popular in the 90s came out in the early 90s so basically every big named actor in hollywood was associated with this movie at one point another he had tom cruise mel gibson matthew mcconaughey johnny depp george clooney and they all declined to do this movie or they went on to do other projects all these dudes they thought it was gonna be a flop mel gibson went and said [ __ ] this i'm doing maverick tom cruise said [ __ ] this i'm doing mission impossible johnny depp said [ __ ] this i'm going to do donnie brasco and yet will smith turn down the matrix to do wild wild west okay

stallone all right we talked about stallone and he won all those razzies over the years for worst actor well this movie it swept the 2000 razzies with five wins and four nominations worst picture or screen couple which is will smith and kevin kline where's director barry seinfeld we're screenplay and finally to tie it all together with my musical selection worst original song will smith wild wild west and honestly look a song for a movie should help right i mean we just you guys had teenage dirtbag and that made me want to see loser when i saw the video this track by will smith made me never want to see wild wild west something that i would not even do until a few years ago and that was only because i was sick and the remote was across the room and i [ __ ] just suffered and watched this piece of [ __ ] somehow though this track right here it would go number one on the billard hot 100 it managed to get certified gold in the process but much like the movie this song would win the 1999 golden raspberry awards for worst original song so that's twice this song one worst original song how can they be wrong uh side note like if you ever actually make it through this entire movie just do me a favor turn off the movie after the giant spider scene or you're gonna end up hearing wild wild west and it'll be stuck in your head for two weeks it's science okay so we got will smith and the atrocity that was wild wild west whether that be the movie or the song or anything with www in it in 1999 all [ __ ] because of will smith thanks that's what i got horrible all right joe finley what did you bring for the music round all right well my uh picks well my pick has actually covers two consecutive weeks in 1979 uh the week of may 12th in the week of may 19th oh showing off a nice drink there i'll show off mine actually no they're not paying so i'm showing by a mistake uh forget it anyways so in a year that had a ton of big things going on in music prince's first single the clash's first american tour ozzy osbourne being fired from black sabbath the cures first album and a wedding jam session that featured three of the beatles mick jagger and eric clapton all at eric clapton's wedding uh i have some bad news for you it was also the the time period where disco held eight of the top ten spots in the billboard hot 100 for two straight weeks this was kind of their last gasp of uh popularity until about two months almost to the day when the infamous disco demolition night happened in chicago which uh was kind of the informal beginning of the end of disco uh but in those weeks so eight of the top 10 in both weeks had were all disco acts among them were donna summer the village people the bg's sister sledge cher uh there was a lot going on there was a there was a jackson's song in there that was very disco-e uh

it was just something to read through this year and every time we do uh any music stuff and you hit the 70s we always hit that rock like the 70s is the just the real birth of this kind of rock we're always bringing up van halen led zeppelin the who what have you and then to have all these cool things happening specifically in this year to have may be dominated by disco is just the worst so that is my pick disco taken over the charts for two weeks of may in 1979. that's not the end of it though because i've had 77 and 78 before they had a good probably three or four year chunk yeah they did but this was right at the end where it was like everybody thought it was kind of over but then a bunch of albums came out and they all did huge again it's horrible right

yeah well it made its way into wedding culture by then so it's too late

it's no wild wild west but you know all right so my music selection for worst of it's kind of a good for me bad for you situation because any time on our facebook page that i post an album with from this band with a bunch of other albums we get hundreds of comments and without a doubt we always get five or six let's say any but this band it's one of those bands that it's kind of like blue cheese and olives either you like them or they completely detest you and the ones who really like them oh they they really like them so i have for you a self-release debut album that was only available on cassette and it was sold at shows until its official release on may 8 1989 recorded at the euphoria sound studios in revere massachusetts from engineer gordon this album was uh would get it a wide cd release in 1992 by elektra where they would actually add three added bonus tracks because of the extra space that would the cd would accommodate the album would go on to sell over 500 000 copies a surprising feat since most of this band's fans suppose disposable income is spent on overpriced concert tickets and nitrous oxide i give you the debut of fish with junta the title of the ban the title of the album junta is actually a tribute to the band's first manager ben giunta hunter fish had a release party for junta on may 9th 1989 at the front club in their native burlington vermont they played a bunch of cuts from the album that night as well as some great covers such as frank zappa's peaches and regalia zz chops lagrange whipping prost from the allman brothers and bold is love from the great jimi hendrix so you look down the uh the track listing here for junta you got fee you enjoy myself esther golgi apparatus foam dinner in a movie divided sky david bowie fluff head fluffs travels and contact now most of these tracks would remain staples in the band's set list to this very day so it's the debut of fish may 8th 1989. that's what i got for the worst of music kind of beauty in the eye of the beholder here i cannot i like when you said fish i didn't believe it because like you listen to them i know i'm a huge fish fan but every time i post it i get hammered and then if you like them you like them if you don't you can't stand them so much so that at the beginning of the pandemic one of the first early memes i saw said if you could cure kovid by sacrificing one band's fan base which band would it be and why fish great you just got us banned off youtube well this this is

this is hard this is like you guys i mean well first of all

i'm a fish fan okay like straight up like uh uh there's there's no album i don't like but when i was in college in the university of scranton pennsylvania from 1991 to 1995 i hated them i couldn't stand them at all because of the type of people who were trying to convince me that they were great not and i was into like hardcores and the pixies i was into fugazi i was into quick sand and helmet so i just wanted nothing to do with this like you know grateful dead barf like stuff but i graduated and two years later uh the story of the ghost came out which was produced by one of my favorite producers andy wallace he doesn't produce a lot of records he mixes a lot of records if you look up his discography you'll see it's just about every hard rock song that you've ever loved in the last 25 or 30 years um and the odd production credit for this record and i was i've just so i discovered fish late on their late later records in the late 90s on my own and was sold and went back and got into them i've seen them live trey anastasia was fantastic they're all great so that's really tough i love golgi apparatus it's one of my favorite fish songs um my favorite of all time is gaiuti which is uh they out did themselves it's beyond masterpiece and i've seen them do it live and they pulled it off so it's like it's a high wire act that is very risky no matter how good you are um so uh yeah uh now getting back to the 70s for a moment here um i can't hate disco because it primed the pump for uh highway to hell which came out in 1979 and then back in black on the heels of it to just like you know take disco down like a sickle you know like it was over it they whatever they did in detroit um whatever the charts were saying i was ac dc who killed um uh who killed the beast and and and that was was done with these two records back to back uh highway to hell back back in black so um i can't really despise disco i also the first band i ever saw live when i was about seven was sean ana and at the time coming off of the grease soundtrack and everything they were kind of like tamper you know like playing with disco a little bit they weren't even like in in disco suits and the fashion it was 50s doo-wop stuff but it was being disco eyes so i didn't see the harm in it at the time as a naive sort of seven-year-old who was like excited to see bowser and and you know just the gold suits and everything so i can't hate on disco um for those reasons uh let me tell you what i know about wild white west

i was old enough to instinctually understand that i couldn't use any of my brain to absorb this that it was that it was such such a devastating waste of time on earth that i and i'm a huge will smith i love will smith okay him and brad pitt whatever they're in i'll watch it this thing and that weird movie where he ages backwards brad pitt uh will smith failed me here but he failed everybody and i don't really think it was his fault because to be fair if you read somebody the script to the matrix in 1997 when they were developing it or whether the brothers would you get it would you really like funny story and i think i told them on the show before i went the opening weekend and i don't know i we came from the bar and went to see the movie and i didn't get it and i was like what the [ __ ] and i had to see a second time second time i was like oh this is [ __ ] amazing but the first time i was like what so i had to explain it to my friends right so so it's pretty revolutionary it became very popular very fast but at the time when he wakes up in the pod and he's like the things are coming out of his arm it was like what just happened like where what right a little bit now a little bit you know i have a high tolerance for weird sci-fi so i made my way through it but something about wild wild west and it might have been the song it might have been the video but all i have in my neural network of that song is one single snapshot of will smith doing this that's it nothing else it's all a blank and i don't know anything about it you told me more about it in this description than i have ever known and i kind of i'm going to work hard to make sure that it goes right out of my brain and leaves room for more important things so i i have to say that it was it was definitely wild west that that failed us all yeah i think so i yeah we'd i think we all have to agree with will smith's mom on that one yeah you could have done better listen to your mother kids this yeah she i mean he should have asked her like what do you think read these scripts maybe she would have also picked wild wild west because like you said matrix was a little trippy like but again like ah it's so bad such a [ __ ] movie i don't get it no it's not the other robot movie like it's not just trash even the combination i love kevin klein too but like the combination of the two is it's oil and vinegar like they just don't they don't go together it's weird i don't know and there's a lot of weird like you know the the southern racial stuff that was going on just had no place in this fun quirky because like uh kenneth branagh is just always making it stop telling me i've got my copy of the script right here the interior you have doing absolutely nothing in the movie except being there it's it's bad all right man crush will you jump out to the lead you pick up another point heading into our first two point round you have control of the board what category are we going with next uh let's go news

is that a gojo yep all right i'll give you the thumbs up then usually you give me the hand and then the thumbs up i'm trying to find a nice i'm trying to find a nicer way to do it because it just feels like shut shut okay you you can speak now on your show just slow down on the pepsi right all right no i'm just keep me waiting let's go may 7 of 19.99 normally like i try to keep most of my selections pretty light-hearted i don't usually go to the dark side to win around however this is a worse stuff episode so i think pretty much anything that joe finley would normally select on a regular episode is fair game today so this one's for you joe this article uh this article entitled jones verdict trickles triggles the jones verdict triggers soul searching by mark jerkowitz side note uh cool [ __ ] name and he needs to be in our new band that we created with krista makes called berserkowicz yes can you imagine if berzerkowicz was headed by mark jerkowitz i mean i i need to shoot that over to him anyhow this is uh via the boston globe and i'm just going to summarize this one a little bit michigan jury found the jenny jones show negligent in the murder of a guest on the program in a ruling criticized by the first amendment and seen as an ominous warning about public anger not only at trash tv but at the increasingly murky mix of entertainment and journalism the 29 million dollar verdict stemmed from a jenny jones episode in which one guest scott amager revealed himself as a secret admirer to another guest jonathan schmitz three days after the march 1995 taping an apparently humiliated schmitz shot and killed amager he is currently awaiting retrial after a 1996 murder conviction was thrown out of appeal thrown out on appeal update on that one he was actually found guilty of second-degree murder he was sentenced to 27 to 50 years there he was paroled in 2017. let's throw that out there all right so uh jones ill-fated secret admirer show seemed unusual and extreme even by talk show standards said tv historian alex mcneil i want that job i want to be the tv historian guy who just tells newspaper [ __ ] do you get paid for that um and it was hard to find anyone with a kind word for the brand of video voyeurism that the jury penalized with its verdict on friday just to sum this whole thing up quickly so scott amager and his friend donna who jonathan schmitz also knew they went on the show to reveal amateur's crush to schmitz and supposedly schmitz he had recently been engaged and some people from doing research assumed that he believed the secret crush was going to be his ex-fiance and in court documents schmitz actually states that the show's producers told him the crush was going to be a female but once schmitz found out that the crush was scott amateur on the show itself and on the tapings which actually didn't premiere but there are videotapes of it he seemed a bit shocked but he took it all in stride he seemed pretty jovial about the whole thing he didn't go crazy but then he fast forward three days and uh scott amateur which is the guy that had the crush he left a suggestive note next to a construction light on jonathan schmidt's porch i don't have the exact note but from what i gather from newspapers it says something along the lines of you have the tools to make this light bright something along those lines so right there schmitz went to the bank he took out cash he purchases a shotgun shells and goes right down to amager's home he eventually approaches the door an argument ensues he goes back to his car he gets a shotgun and then he shoots amateur twice in the chest killing him like immediately here's the kicker of the whole thing though that 29 million dollars that was awarded to imager's family was eventually overturned the michigan appeals court they ruled in 2002 that the show had and i quote no duty to anticipate and prevent the active murder committed by schmitz three days after leaving the studio so not only this guy die but his family was left with nothing because they overturned the whole ruling so i'm bringing a downer for the news round wow that's a bummer man jeez that's why i don't do it on a normal episode but this one yeah it's fair game to bring it out on a worse stuff for sure i want to rewind let's go back to the conversation that some tv executive had at a table somewhere a few years before the jenny jones show launched where they're like why don't we do this and yeah and somebody probably said devil's advocate well you know this could happen and they're like no but the ratings would be gold ah that won't happen come on the the other kicker this episode actually never even aired so i mean it's it's shitty to say but all this was done for nothing because it never even made it to television somebody has it yeah i think they showed it in court they showed the uh and there are clips i think i found a couple on youtube but it's not much all right joe finley what did you bring for the news round all right you want to get bummed out let's get bummed out all right i'm gonna he knows how to do it hey depressing [ __ ] is my life baby um so i will take your murder and miscarriage of justice and raise you another murder and more miscarriage of justice uh let's go to san francisco california may 21st 1979. dan white is only convicted of first degree manslaughter in the assassination of san francisco mayor george busconi and city supervisor harvey milk while uh white got the lenient sentence thanks to his lawyer's defense that he had diminished mental capacity due to depression that he felt after resigning from the board of supervisors then asking to be reinstated and not being reinstated by the mayor uh the apparent symptoms of his depression he was eating more junk food and what became known as the twinkie defense uh actually got his sentence lowered from first-degree murder to first-degree manslaughter which only for two counts of first-degree manslaughter only garnered a maximum sentence of seven years of which he only served five uh the sentence actually caused the gay community in san francisco to riot in what was called the white knight riots that very night and uh you know all of this is featured in uh the movie milk of course uh and what was crazy is another big part of it so the lawyers say he had diminished capacity uh he didn't know what he was doing all this stuff after he got out of jail but shortly before he committed suicide he admitted to a police inspector that he actually did uh premeditate the murders and also had planned to kill assemblyman willie brown and supervisor carol ruth silver as well but just didn't get around to it i guess uh so a couple of murders a lame defense a questionable sentence and a riot all within a very short period of time may 21st 1979

bring in the sadness for the news round block the news round somebody mentioned in the chat is uh they were like is this uh news round equals true crime

yeah if you just release yeah release this just by itself and it becomes true crime yeah it would be like number one on itunes there we go well i i actually had some pretty dark stuff happen in may of 1989 but i chose not to go with it actually i wanted to take a slightly different tone so it's may 1989 and where do you go for the worst of news to the pages of the weekly world news of course so this article comes from the may 2nd issue where the headline was us astronauts close encounter rocks nasa space shuttle invaded by aliens star creatures boarded discovery and top secret radio conversations prove it experts say you know but if we dig deep deep into the pages of the everybody's favorite news rag we find an article tucked way in the bottom right hand corner of page eight with the headline sausage helps cop arrest drug suspect so it naturally discovered

a naked a naked and angry woman was smacked in the head with a sausage when drunk when drug agents burst into her apartment and started throwing pieces of meat at her attack dog british authorities said the woman's husband was the target of the drug raid knowing the couple had a vicious rottweiler in the apartment drug agents came armed with a mound of sausages to distract the dog officials said the woman hopped out of bed when she heard the police burst in and got whacked in the head with a piece of sausage the stunned house housewife picked up the sausage threw it back at the officers and ordered her attack dog to kill drug agents saved themselves by feeding handfuls of meat to the rottweiler then placed the woman's husband under arrest so and you can read about this and all of the other great stories in the weekly world news on newsstands may 2nd 1989 side note my movie there's a scene where it's batman it's not actual batman it's a guy named batman who carries around a bat well he gives his bat away and he ends up beating up a grandmother with a uh a 12-inch dildo oh that's almost like a sausage it's almost like a sausage just made me think of that so i could throw it out snagged um man this is that was like uh that was like having to watch wild wild west and then have a banana split um do you want me to read wild wild west lyrics to even you out yeah let's do it all right let's see let's see i think i have okay any damsel in distress be out of that dress when she meet jim west roughneck go so check the law and abide watch your step with flex and get a hole in your side poetry yeah shakespeare you all you forgot you forgot wiki wild wild oh yeah

i didn't want to do that one i figured the lyrics are a little bit oh man um well so i'm supposed to pick the worst of this uh the uh first of all though the harvey milk thing is is just disturbing as hell and also i this is a little morbid but can we know more about dan white please because this sounded like there's not enough explanation going on here this guy is very strange yeah so i i can give you a little bit more background so basically dan white uh it was a like a kind of a hyper conservative who didn't like uh that uh specifically harvey milk being the first openly gay member of the supervisor's board was appointed and he resigned in protest and then when they realized that that meant that the mayor was going to be able to appoint who he wanted and he was a very progressive mayor and so very unlikely that somebody that he would support would be selected so he has to be reinstated but uh it met with a lot of resistance not just from the mayor but from other people in the uh you know in the mayor's office and in city hall and so he had uh the way it went down on on the day of the murder he actually snuck in a window at the side of city hall because he knew he would be subject to a metal detector if he went in the front entrance and he shot both the mayor and harvey milk within city hall and i guess he was looking for the other two then he took himself to his former because he's a former cop he took himself to uh his former precinct turned himself in

that's still that doesn't do like there's something there's something missing from this in in like a i don't know like giant arc of the universe kind of way like what made dan white well according to his lawyers junk food well yeah that's [ __ ] though like like what what is what is the um

he was he was in a position of power right he was an elected official yeah like like he was there and um did he just like come up thinking that like oh if you have opposition in politics you kill them like is that what where did that what that's that's sort of like even for the 70s we were you know or the aes which were pretty [ __ ] up that's a that's another strange i i'm i wanted to know what the hell because there's a lot of true crime you know serial killer stuff out there and i feel like he's he's an untold serial killer story was he killing other people like it's like i find it hard to believe that the first time that he decided to kill somebody was at his job at city hall you know like that's true that's a little bit like he did that before that's a leap yeah maybe when he was on the job as a cop he who's like routinely killed you know people who couldn't defend themselves or like whatever else i would be surprised really surprised if that was the oh he was like suddenly i ate a twinkie and i shot my colleagues you know get out of here that's like that's like my guy they blamed uh the first time he got out of that trial one of the things they said was well he's got graves disease and that makes your thyroid overactive and he you know he gets mad easily and that's why he did it well and that worked yeah well it's just like my guy you know they they put the hulk on trial i had a drink in my mouth dude i'm glad i raped anybody i love you mark well no it is interesting though you did pick two people who seem to have flown themselves way off the handle like what kind of extreme homophobia are we dealing with even in the late 90s that you're gonna go and completely destroy your life get a shotgun and go kill a guy who like hairs right like it's kind of flattering it's like oh cool like bull sex is kind of like me yeah none of them if i could just put it two of you too it was san francisco like it was it's not like it you know yeah well both are you saying both cases occurred in san francisco oh it was they were both oh oh no no for mine right right right yeah well i mean you know there's you know well anyway that's that's joe trying to push his case on on an unrelated side note um the jericho it's berkowitz thing really berserkowicz i got stuck on that yeah the berserkers i saw a band do you want to be in the band too i will yeah maybe so so so i saw i opened for a band when i was playing clubs in in new york um called uh uh philatio and the wet t-shirt contest these guys were from uh i think south carolina or virginia or something and they were really weird they wore like prep school button-down shirts and singer had a strap-on dildo that was sticking out of his zipper and the bass player was called wank stankly and they were they had this you met my plumber was a drummer connie lingus i think so are you looking them up right now did you find out no i don't know so i had their demo tape and i just remember thinking that this is the strangest most sort of like their banter in between he was like a game show host to be like okay that was a good one like a whole whole stick right so that was a that was a moment that i was brought back to wankstankly and berkowitz jerkowitz or whatever you had going on there um but uh yeah this is the i consider the harvey milk thing and the and the the the jenny jones thing to be equally disturbing and diff for different reasons they're both reflective of what we're basically dealing with now which is that right wingers think that if they lose they can just kill people um and and uh you know i mean also the the media thing on the jenny jones tip like what part of that horror show didn't eventually seep into our like cable news right that's basically like of the dna of of everything that that is presented on fox and you know so like i feel like uh i feel like they merge into one thing that's equally just just gross and so i'm gonna go with like a dead tie for the first two and i'm gonna i'm gonna totally let uh sausage dog off the hook

wow all right i pick up two points in our first two point round and we're heading into our final round the hot products round so i'll go first here for the hot products round uh now my hut product is a version of a game that was first popularized that first popularized light gun rail shooters in the late 80s and early 90s now this gras this game is described as a group of desperate terrorists is keeping hostage hostages in their jungle fortress as a member of his of an elite tactical squad you must invade their hideout destroy their operations and get the hostages out alive maneuver through a series of missions and fight off soldiers patrol boats helicopters and more so i'm sure we've all dropped many a quarters into this video game at the arcades over the years and then when you saw that you could play the game at home on your nes system no quarters required everybody wanted a copy of this game and if there was ever any game that would you were more disappointed in when you brought it home and played it on your nes it was this game as great as the original arcade game was this nes version lacks the any excitement any of the smooth gameplay and you know nothing beats the feeling of the cold hard steel of an uzi in your hands as you played operation wolf but all of that goes away on the nes because you have to play the game using the zapper the controller and it's just constant trigger pulling choppy graphics it's got poor hit markers and hit detection but luckily the nes port was not enough to kill off the franchise it did have a three more sequels operation operation thunderbolt and operation wolf 3 and of course operation tiger now i actually have a copy of said operation wolf on the nes right here and i got my light gun now when you're playing it in the arcade and you got the uzi you just got that that big oozy feel and you're mowing down now if you're playing at home it's

you've got the controller in the other i love that sound that spring it's so adorable that's so weak

now so i got operation wolf here on nes now on the back of this it has the initials ut now this here's a game we can play inside the game leave your answers in the comments on our youtube video this is 1980s i didn't know a whole lot of girls that played operation wolf so 1980s boys names that start with the letter u go you're right good luck with that one that's what i have for my worst hot product we just killed that we just lost that round bro like we just spit out two you names like two seconds oh i didn't hear them what were they he he said ulysses i said uriah uriah and ulysses uncle jesse so yeah operation wolf on the nes is my worst of hot product for may 1989. all right joel finley what is your hot product okay well um it's it's an interesting product it's a little bit of a uh like a bit of a step outside the box so to speak um and usually we go to our friends at newspapers.com for such things but i had to go a little bit further out and i had to find an article in the 2016 japan times wow that discussed this and it was obviously yeah i find that uh oh it was me digging it was me reverse digging from finding the product to finding the article uh so uh in early may of 1979 japan was buzzing about architect kisho kirikawa's latest building uh designed to be as he said a hotel for 2001. this hotel was like nothing that anybody had ever seen before and it offered solo guests a place to sleep for 1500 yen a day which equaled at the time about 14 u.s so i give you the capsule in osaka the capsule hotel where you your room was basically the size of a bed it was three feet wide by three feet tall by six feet deep and you slid yourself in there and they were stacked too high so you'd have to take a ladder up if you were on the top one and slide yourself in there was a small tv in there a small shelf and hopefully some air conditioning not always the case uh men only men for at least the first while were allowed to stay in these things and they were designed mainly for as they said japanese salarymen but mostly for drunk businessmen who just couldn't make it home safely they've had a place to just crash and sleep it off um you were given you actually had to give your clothes up at the door and they gave you a robe and that's what you slept in and you put all your stuff in a separate locker all bathrooms showers all of that are communal um in addition to the claustrophobia that you could suffer in such a little room guests could look forward to a stunning lack of security as the doors you had don't lock because they're at your feet but they didn't always have doors sometimes it was just a little privacy curtain so you heard everything from your neighbors you heard them snoring you heard god knows what else in addition to being in the room the walls were so thin if the people are bumping them which they most assure surely were cause you're just in a in a horizontal uh phone booth uh you're banging into walls and you're dealing with that the person who wrote the japan times article said they spent a night in one a very restless night in one in 1980 and said they would absolutely never do it again um what else do you have uh

oh you also have uh the inconvenience of having to check in and out each day because they wouldn't allow for multi-day stays at the beginning so if you did want to stay for multiple days you had to check out give back your robe check back in get your robe back and do it all again and maybe get the same bed

i wonder if there were people who did that oh these were these were a popular oh i'm sure there were quite a few things um what became crazy is later on uh during a recession in japan it actually became a major place for the homeless to stay a lot of people who lost their homes in the recession had no place better and this was a cheap uh way to do it and the hotels started allowing people to pay a monthly fee to stay there and make that little phone booth their apartment uh while the hotel is literally my nightmare they've spread all over the world there's a cheap place to stay now averaging from about 30 to 70 a night uh depending on amenities and all the other things but they're mainly kind of like for like a hostel now and they exist in countries like england china poland russia belgium iceland india and indonesia uh so they're spreading around they've gotten more high-tech the wi-fi some of the pods have gotten a little bit bigger so you can actually sit up in them a little bit but they're still just pods and they still have the same issues that they did before only so many allow you to allow women to stay and they have to stay on separate floors just for security reasons so i give you a horrible way to sleep the capsule in in osaka in may of 1979. that's funny they still existed when i was in the marine corps when i got into second battalion seventh marines the uh the marines that were there when i first got into the unit they were stuck in okinawa for like 11 months because of the war that was going on they were they were already like midway through that deployment and they couldn't leave so they were stuck there forever so they would go on these like retreats to like tokyo or whatever and one of the guys was in battalion when i got there he's a huge guy not like not fat he was huge he looked like a professional wrestler and he would go to those things he would get [ __ ] housed drunk at like 19 years old and sleep in their butt ass naked and one time he got arrested and i heard all about the story and i've seen the pictures dude it it literally looks like a crypt it looks like you're in a coffin just without the roof and there's a curtain crazy [ __ ] it's not funny because it's like an ugly american story but the image of like some giant like corn fed marine with his feet sticking out of the box that's exactly what this guy is he was when i got there he's like six i'm not gonna give his name obviously six four like 250 like enormous does not fit in the little space that they give you with like shoulders against the wall like he'd sleep there and he'd be like halfway out of the curtain leg dangling out and i guess one time he was too like just banged up and he was like he puked on the floor or something they don't deal with that [ __ ] in japan in the end i don't know if he got arrested i think he just the cops came there and you know hassled them or whatever but i think they let them stay they're very nice over there japan wow all right man crush what did you bring for the news round all right first thing last round everybody that's in the chat please do us a favor and go and hit the alert button hit the like button hit the subscribe button all that stuff helps us we never mention this [ __ ] because we've been in podcast for years and we're just getting on to this video stuff and we don't know what we're doing so we're just telling you now please go ahead if you're still here we see people here go ahead and hit that alert button that little bell uh hit the subscribe hit the like uh obviously that'll get more people over to these videos but let's go to may 3rd 1999 and you know what i'm not going to try to be coy with this one because people in the chat they're going to get this one as soon as i begin um i'll say this waiting 16 years for a movie of this magnitude to come out people were lined up outside toy stores like [ __ ] was black friday at walmart stores like toys r us open their doors at midnight and we're talking about may 3rd here not the fourth which would have made way more sense but they did it on the third which makes this even worse uh the first three movies in this franchise they cleaned up they cleaned up when it came to toys not only did fans of this movie dig these toys but collectors were all over them so when the doors slid open at midnight for the official studio sanctioned spending frenzy surrounding star wars episode 1 the phantom menace fans and investors swarmed right over any offering they had right so this is a piece of an article that i found from may of 1999 pretty much sums up everything that happened okay so let me just summarize this it's less than a quarter hour into the release of various star wars merchandise and the action figures of mace windu of course that samuel jackson's portrayal of master jedi have already been snapped up at a very suspicious light speed when the window whispers can be heard throughout the store rolando herrera 23 if hialeah combs the depleted displays while simultaneously and this is [ __ ] cracks me up cell phoning a friend who the [ __ ] says cell phoning he's selfish this is 1999. he was probably one of the only people with a cell phone in the store he's cell phoning a friend at the toys r us in hollywood florida and i quote he says they're already out of window what's the status there and then the article goes on to say could windu be the one that rare toy among these amongst these countless toys the the coveted seven dollar piece of plastic that could be a collectible worth hundreds or thousands of dollars one day nope savvy clerks quickly bring more boxes from the back but a brief burst of window media helps explain the sort of thinking that drives hundreds of people to the south florida toys r us and tens of thousands of people across the nation almost all of them adults to stand in line for hours to go toy shopping when most people are in bed this is my opinion here but not only is this the worst star wars in the entire franchise but i found these mace window dolls on ebay for less than seven dollars in the package right [ __ ] now and it's not just mace window it's basically all these figures they're worth the same thing that they were in 1999 and let's not forget possibly the worst character in any star wars movie ever jar jar binks which they had hoped would be adored like chewbacca or c-3po or like yo whatever baby yoda it was a massive disappointment and they even made and i found ads fest a jar jar binks board game who the [ __ ] wanted that thanks thanks mom for this jar [ __ ] jar jar binks anyway so like here we have a massive massive not even just one hot product we have tons of hot products but they flooded the market so much yeah that you know and i think all of us but probably the people in the chat and everything else we bought one or another like we bought them because we thought like all right i'm gonna grab this i'll keep it in the package because one day this is kind of like that superman comic i had that i ripped open you know i don't know it was a couple months ago in an episode yeah actually it wasn't even that that long ago it was like two months ago um you know we bought these things we're like oh these are gonna be collector's items we're gonna we're gonna have so much money i'm gonna put my kid through college with all the [ __ ] that i bought and it's worth seven [ __ ] bucks or less now i mean we all thought it was gonna be worth a minute and we're all disappointed you just go to ebay you look at the flood of [ __ ] from phantom menace they just flooded the market yeah it wasn't like 1983 with you know returning the jedi they kind of flooded the market a little bit empire not as much and obviously star wars there was collector's items there were worth a lot of money i have so many once once they hit phantom menace it was like let's just put out as many as possible because everyone's gonna buy them up and they did we all did and now nobody [ __ ] wants them and they're downstairs in my basement i have like several of them in the room right next to me that like i'd probably be better off throwing them out than trying to ship them to somebody you know oysters have plastic in them too yeah yeah we just [ __ ] the environment throw that in there too i mean it is what it is but yeah it's uh it's the release of all the phantom menace stuff and that happened which is weird too like i mentioned earlier why did they do this on may the 3rd were they not aware in 1999 that may the fourth be with you which actually happens to be my daughter's birthday which is why we're big star wars fans did they do this on may the third at midnight so no no no no i checked that too but they didn't because it was a monday and the article came out on a tuesday so no they didn't it was just may the third like wow what do you what do you do and nobody in marketing was like put that together i was like wait a minute let's just do this on tuesday because it'll be the fourth we're gonna miss yeah um wow well you want my analysis of this yeah because brendan it all comes down to you right now because uh it's it's an open game between mark and myself joe joe you're this you're just yeah the game here don't worry about me i just uh you know i just stayed up late for this [ __ ] just to reset the game here joe has no points uh nick has two points and uh i have three points so let's throw it over to brendan brown for the final ruling on this game okay well some somehow and this surprised me as well um this segment was more depressing than the news

so um i'm i'm a guy who i experienced failed products through my brother my brother was really into video games and and all of the like sort of cartoon stuff that he he wanted to get all that first and when when it let him down it really let him down and the first instance of that was we had the et video game and i had i will never forget him sitting there with that controller in his hand going just give me a piece of crap i can't like and after hours and really just like like you know his face is all red and he's just bulging he's just like could he couldn't get there he couldn't do it nobody could um so and then he also had i had a similar experience with him uh when we went to see the transformers uh live action cartoon film in every live action cartoon film in 1985 i think it was a hasbro uh first person and he it was the first time he used the f word in front of my mother he came out of the theater and what does he think pete the [ __ ] it sucked he killed optimus prime he died like he was just a wreck it ruined him right so so failed products you know it's real for me um and i was thinking of that when you were talking about your nes operation whoop i never even heard of operation wolf um i we did have the duck hunt you know gun which was weak um and uh you know it was like uh

video games were finding their way so i'm not sure i can i it was still it was still dark days you know it was it was still the dark ages um the japanese thing the the capsule hotel thing that's another one like i've had a nightmare on the bus when we're touring you know have you ever been on a tour bus the bunk yeah there's just a curve same thing yeah it's the same thing right so i have had a semi-recurring nightmare of waking up on the bus bunk and like my ass is hanging out of the curtain but i am outside the bus i'm on the exterior and there are there's like the line of people waiting to get in and i'm just like farting and like sleeping and it's just this like this horrible like it just that really got me all shook up on that um so that's it also feels like it it sounds to me like they designed like a a prison from blade runner and was like isn't this great like you know so uh yeah there's there's a little comic relief in that for me um i have a hard time hating anything to do with the phantom menace even though i was really um sort of heartened by your mispronouncing windu over and over again that's i was going to say something no no it's not it's not i call him mace but then the rap you know like i get him confused with the rapper so i use his last name like [ __ ] fight me like come on

he's on a first name basis yeah all of this is amazing because i'm i'm a trekkie i don't give a [ __ ] about star wars like you know like but but anyway um i mean you look look star wars look i look i can watch it i can enjoy jedi jedi is one of my favorites i like it i can watch phantom menace i'll be okay with that um one of my good friends he's got a license plate that says red five you know blah blah so um but uh but star trek is a much better franchise it has character development and arcs and politics and really good [ __ ] and star trek it just beats star wars for those reasons and lots of other reasons but i i didn't hate this film i saw it on the third uh and it came out later and it came out later that was just the uh right or whatever the whatever opening it was like two weeks two or three weeks later right so may may the 14th okay no they [ __ ] that up too it was probably you in the first yeah so i saw it in union square pack theater everyone waiting online around the block um and something tipped me off to it being all wrong when uh the intro lo you know in a uh in a galaxy for whatever long time ago that that font that they used that sort of glow-in-the-dark font came on the screen and i clapped and i got shushed

right i got shushed in new york city by this crowd that was like really serious about this you know dude it's been 16 years you shut your mouth for that but hold on a second you're supposed to [ __ ] read it there's no dialogue everyone knows like every star trek movie is like look at this essay that we wrote for you that's gonna roll up the screen for 15 minutes before anybody says a word so i thought it would be like i thought i'd be part of like a fun like yay it's happening but okay whatever shut up nerd yeah a bunch of haters

um so uh yeah this was tough this was like this was like a hard one by the way uh i actually had a next telephone on my hip in that theater so uh for the job that i had at the time so i'll have you know that not it wasn't so rare to have a cell phone um were you cell phoning when you were in the theater i actually i actually think i turned it off that's why he got shushed he was on the phone going a long time ago in a galaxy far far away no no actually how did the chirp go again for next time do you remember i was like oh god if i heard that right now i'd have a seizure that's terrible um so uh anyway the the

i think that the phantom menace has the best saber fight i think it has darth maul is the one of the best villains ever i didn't hate that movie i couldn't stand it as a 30 minute race right it has a pod race i i two was the worst i didn't hate it i didn't hate it because i i wrote a lot of stuff off like for the kids for the kids for the kids you know i'm not eight anymore so this doesn't hit so for the kids right and then the darth maul scene just was incredible that was the best saber fight in the whole series so i'm not going to hate on that um before we go any further i just want to say some people don't [ __ ] on me i'm not i'm not saying it's a total piece of [ __ ] i'm just saying in the hierarchy of what is the eight films i have it at the bottom that's all it is right kind of like we were talking about this uh on our facebook page with rambo three yesterday tons of people chimed in on this it's not this [ __ ] it's just the worst of the rambo films and i think this is the same thing it's not terrible there's other it's way better than other movies but in the the hierarchy of the franchise i just don't see it is rambo three the one where he goes to afghanistan and yes and rides horses with the dead sheep right dead sheep game yeah was that one yeah i remember the exploding arrows from that that was like oh yeah it really holds up with the uh the whole helping the mujadine it's uh it's it's really good it ages very well yeah sorry give me the side anyway um so this one is turning out to be the toughest i must say uh the worst of these is gonna have to be for me i think operation wolf because because the feelings of of darkness and disappointment in my little brother that i just i could never help him out of that darkness you know he was beyond my reach um that's real that's very real all right so that means i pick up a victory in this game with five points over man crushes two that's actually good because what i've been doing uh i think this was was it two in a row that i won i've been wearing the same hoodie and i haven't washed it so this time yeah this is a good thing i get to wash it i just burp because i've been drinking [ __ ] beer this whole time but um brendan dude tell us about before you go to like we get away from this whole game and i wanted to bring this up earlier there's a whole story

tied into one of the rounds that i had can you tell the story behind that i know it's not just the movie it's there's something behind it well um yeah it's interesting uh you know when we first came out when our record first came out and we were doing press and stuff i would get the question what's a teenage dirtbag what is that you know and it was this light-hearted like is it a misfit is it a blah blah and it was like those things were all true but i never really was was brave enough initially to to like explain where that word came from what it meant to me when i was a kid and what it meant was like growing up in long island in 1984 um north port town i grew up in was a pretty violent place there's a lot of drugs um it's kind of a lobster town on decline and you know both parents worked in in most families and and there was a sort of like satan group like of kids who were who were pretty rough and beat you up and take your bike or whatever um and uh in the summer of 84 uh two of them kind of lured their friend into the woods a kid that they'd been in kindergarten with like grown up with and they murdered him with a knife and there was much drug taking acid lsd um or i think mescaline whatever the police report is ridiculous on this but these were like 17 year old kids who were had access to really really really lots of heavy drugs and and were used to doing it and so and uh not only did they kill their friend but the sort of main guy who did it um this kid named ricky casso he he led guided tours of the body uh for two and a half weeks before anybody snitched and that was the kind of culture it was like they're watching their friend decompose and it was like nobody went to the cops nobody told their parents it was a dark place it was it was rough and uh those kids were dirt bags and so was i for my tape case full of ac dc because ricky got arrested wearing an ac dc shirt right it was on the cover of all the newspapers and evening news and whatever else and there was just lockdown and curfews and and uh the identity dirt bag became this like homicidal satanic like nightmare right so um it was the first whiff of hypocrisy that i got from adults like i don't think it's the music that you know like like uh and a lot of my musical identity you know when you're 10 years old and you're starting to go into town with your bike and buy pizza you're starting to develop your own personality and your own who you are and a lot of who i was was ac dc and iron maiden tapes and i had prince tapes and huey lewis in the news and it was all sort of mixed in there trying to starting to form the soup of who i would be playing guitar and all that stuff and so suddenly that became like this criminal enterprise that was um you know mystical and and uh and bonfires in the woods and and all that and that was what a dirtbag was there's a rolling stone article that goes in depth about it from november 22 1984 um where the term dirtbag is first used in print in the sort of accurate sort of vernacular of the time they hyphenated it i don't think they should have but but it's it's interviews with kids from the town i grew up in the murder happened uh in the woods uh a couple blocks behind my house and um you know there was a lot of woods out there at the time um it was just uh an abnormal event that i grew up thinking was normal and was like oh of course you know somebody killed kids killed each other kind of thing and um and in this bizarre and like grotesque way you know um and it was a small town there's only 8 000 people lived there at the time so it was like everybody knew that you know this was you couldn't escape this um so when i was riding teenage dirtbag in the summer of 95 um wow that's only 11 years later uh i was kind of meditating on that walking around town and being that kid again or being in that in that place and the identity trying to make something of it that would be uh redeemed somehow you know like some narrative that that was that wasn't all of that darkness um and that's where the the title came from teenage dirtbag the title came from that identity in that world back then and it's so d it's so crazy because you you tell that story and if i told that to my 15 year old daughter who loves that song she she's loved that song since she was a little girl like since she was like five or six and if she knew that it would like it's completely different the way that you guys do the song and what it's about it's crazy yeah that's why i just wanted to hear it from you and it kind of ties in with the worst dub episode to to hear what it's really about i mean it's crazy i don't think a lot of people realize it i should say i don't think that the song is about ricky caso um obviously the bringing the gun to school thing is an is sort of a nod to the violence and uh i did want the song to have that menacing uh tension um but what it means to people like your daughter and people who have covered it and you know phoebe bridgers and and um you know russian kelly in one direction and it's a song that that was the first one that they hooked into when they were 10 or whatever right so it's not like this dark like suburban satanic panic song in any sense except that that's where i came from and that's what a dirtbag was to me when i was writing it but what a dirtbag is to anybody else who pays attention to it and this was totally on purpose is it has to make sense to them in their world so that it continues so that it you know is of value to somebody who didn't grow up in northport in 1984 you know so i think that the the song um the way it lives in people's own imaginations and the way that they identify with it in their worlds is way more important than you know my weird dark story that you know where i wound up not going to the public high school because of it and was a commuter and had no friends and played guitar all the time and you know that was a that all is like incidental you know to the to the what people what it does for them you know yeah it's interesting hearing that because we had we had krista makes was just on last week from less than jake and he's got this whole show called uh kristin makes a podcast and he has a band come on and they talk about one particular song and they kind of break it down everything like stuff that i don't even understand about notes and things like that but they also go over to lyrics and i think it's it's super interesting because one of the things he told us last week was i was like well it's great because every time we do these shows and i pick a music around and i go over the lyrics and i google it and i do this research and i find out what it's about he's like yeah that's just all wrong that that you're looking at he's like everything that you that you researched totally incorrect he's like i'm going through this stuff with people and uh that's not what the song is about would you say that that is correct pretty much from from your own standpoint i'm really i'm really slow to scold anybody on on how to how they feel or interpret that well no he wasn't scolding it he was just saying like the original intent oh okay the song was not what people said sure i mean the author is dead man like as soon as you do something then you put it out there your intention is for [ __ ] right it's going to be absorbing you know it's going to be it's going to be taken on by other people and frankly the reason you do it is hoping that somebody thinks something of it that you didn't think of that that it becomes something else to somebody else and in that sense whoever loves a song owns it because no one can have it the way they have it you know no one can experience it so the the um the communication of music doesn't have anything to do with the author's intent right in some how does how does that feel as a writer that it's it's no longer yours it's somebody else to interpret it the way that they want to that's the point that's the whole point you're giving it you know i mean you keep your publishing and you hope to sustain some career out of right right if some record company [ __ ] is making a million dollars you hope to make you know 75 grand like alex p keaton but you uh in 1989 yeah yeah but but uh for what you wasn't today right right but what you're doing and the reason that is sort of cliche but like musicians artists are kind of like paying attention to the money's not really their thing because that's not where it comes from you know and and if you're faking that part of it then you're gonna get [ __ ] called on you real early so uh because it's in the dna of it you know you can just smell something's wrong but um yeah you've given it away you're giving it to other people's neural networks and how they develop you know ac dc gave me highway to hell you know and i took that somewhere with myself you know yeah that's amazing that's like probably one of the most authentic answers i've heard to any question i've ever asked of any guest oh absolutely on that note i uh i actually uh saw you perform at that song on the chris gethard show on eminem way back in the day it's so cool and it was so cool because it's again kind of how i interpreted the song you know is essentially these two outcasts finding each other and what better crowd is that other than the gethered crowd who that entire community of which i am a part uh is just a bunch of outcasts who all found each other and it was like that was late in the m n run and i was just like oh that would should have been the theme the whole time for these guys yeah i was so inspired by him that was what was that like 2014 or 13 um that kind of surprised us to get invited to something so sort of like cool but um you know i he was he blew me away it was just like oh my god this guy is such a weirdo and he just keeps doing what he wants like you know it's so cool he doesn't need permission or he's not he's not insecure about it like i would be really insecure trying the [ __ ] he tries you know so um but yeah he's great that was great what about what about the new songs i don't know how much more time you have yeah no it's fine um so uh the well what we're doing right now um the masters for our first record the one with teenage dirtbag on it they seem to be lost i handed them over to the label five sets of them or four sets of them back in 2000 and then we never got them back so um and also over the years when it was time for like rock band to license it it just it didn't pop in there i wasn't in control of them so i couldn't hand them over to for the game to be authored and stuff so we were always kind of curious like what what's going on with these tapes like where are they and uh i started calling the label and to try and figure out where they were and i didn't get any good answers uh so we started re-recording the record so we could have a working version of it because we don't and uh we finished multi-tracking was like 99 of it is finished multi-tracking uh as of last month and then we got called out on tour by uh everclear in living color which was another surprise so we kind of like put the pause button on the on the recording for now but we got eight of the songs out and the way we're doing it is we're doing the original ten teenage dart bags already on spotify teenage everybody 2020. i should say the new one um we funny story we did that in april uh a little over a year ago and sony music the original label they made a copyright claim on it because they thought it was the same one um it's not it's completely re-recorded there's no original element from the first recording in it at all um and we we proved that over the course of like about a month with our lawyer and so they let it go so it's ours now um but uh that's been on spotify for uh it's coming up on almost a year in july i think or something like that um but we're doing the whole first record over again each song of the ten and we're also pairing them with like an alternate universe version of the first record so like there was all these songs from over the years that sounded like they belonged on album one but that's why we didn't record them you know they just kind of got shelved we pulled all them out of the vault and now this this record is 20 songs um it was supposed to be the 2020 20th anniversary record with 20 songs on it we know what happens with that idea exactly so we covered slowed us right down um and we kind of crawled through it over the pandemic you know when you make music you're supposed to be in the same room with each other like you know in a non-ventilated space that's soundproof so it's like the worst condition for covid you could imagine so it took a really long time and uh now we're uh we're probably gonna wind up finishing the whole thing in for like christmas 20 20 21 uh 20 songs eight of which are already on spotify right now and we're touring uh playing a lot of them uh with everclear and uber's tank and uh living color one of my favorite like eighties you know i don't know oh yes dude tell tell people it's a summerland tour i already got my tickets and that's how we kind of got hooked up with you guys because i bought my tickets and i was like we're out of my daughter's birthday and i got an email saying that it was like a pre-sale i was like what the [ __ ] i was like yeah i'm buying tickets this this is the start of my summer you guys are the first concert that i'm going to in over a year and a half which is [ __ ] crazy um tell us about the summerland tour well what's going on i mean dream come true uh you know living color i remember being what 14 15 and watching uh open letter to a landlord video on on mtv and just being like what is this this is incredible this is like uh this is like my mother's motown music but it's got my shreddy guitar in it and like this is so sick and i i was obsessed with for for a time uh and trying to play like vernon reed in my mother's living room and failing miserably and like giving up like he's the only guitar player i've ever given up trying to be like you know like it was just like no does cory still wear the uh the surf uh outfit or is that i don't know i don't know i don't know i'll tell you what though the videos of them i've seen lately they they are still sharp as attack and killing it so i'm really excited about i would buy tickets to this tour myself if i wasn't on it you know um but uh but everclear also art alex sack as a songwriter you know father of mine hit me real hard when it came out and like he's one after another of these tunes that say something important that are like still very accessible and rock your face off and hoover stank is like the big like radio ballad band that we never imagined we could be on the road like that's like a success level that we don't even ever even get like and they just redid uh their song they just redid the reason did they really all that was it like 20 maybe i don't know if it was 2020 or 2019 they went and did it acoustically and right dude it's amazing it's so good right yeah there that and also they're like from that incubus school of like where [ __ ] got really funky and you had to be able to really play well and like i i'm i'm a fan so um yeah it's it's a dream come true it's really a dream come true and it's the strangest thing to be snapped out of the pandemic with let me tell you like we haven't been working we haven't been rehearsing we're cramming like six months of work into 45 days to hit the road you know so i mean i don't know if you can tell i'm totally exhausted right now like i've been like so you're doing fantastic four nights a week yeah well coffee certainly helps but um yeah it's because you drink it with your pinky up i saw that exactly um yeah no it's really cool it's really cool we all had to kind of pinch ourselves and say are we really is this safe are we really doing that i don't care if i die i'm going on here tour with living color yeah let's do it you know but um but there was you know a lot of feelings around like the people that i know locally because you guys are playing this one place it's the orange county speedway um which i haven't seen a concert in the orange county speedway since like 1997 but i didn't care as soon as i saw that you guys were playing and i saw the bands are lined up i immediately bought tickets i don't know what it looks like in there we had chris baron on here last year talking [ __ ] about the speedway and like all kinds of crazy stories from uh like him driving a [ __ ] bulldozer in front of who's who like soul asylum's trailer or some [ __ ] like that but you guys are going to be there and i haven't seen anything since then and the last concert i've been to was like a year and a half ago so i'm so excited and you guys will be the first one that i've seen in like a year and a half which is yeah well thank you first of all thanks for buying tickets um and yeah i mean like i said it's like it's a level of touring that we have often tried for in the states and now no one's ever really given us a chance and i'm really we're grateful in a way you know we hope everybody gets vaccinated and is real safe and we we you know conquer this well it's going to be an endemic now we know we're all going to have to get shots moving forward like you know on a routine basis um but we just we're just glad that everyone was able to kind of like get their [ __ ] together and be safe and and have this opportunity it's a big surprise to us and it's like we're not going to forget about that this is a dream coming true ever oh this is going to be great look all right since we're talking about the road let's get back into the fun path and [ __ ] the pandemic and all that we had krista makes on last week from less than jake probably told us the best road story ever we ask everybody any band that's ever been on give us a good road story and a lot of times it's like some pc stuff they can't tell us too much and then krista makes comes out and tells us about this story with no effects and this s m club everybody's naked and there's asian chicks whipping dudes and pouring wax on them tell us something good about the road that you remember over the course of your career oh man putting you on yeah wait a minute wait yeah i was going to say way to set a bar for or you could just grab your guitar and play a song because you don't want to be a snitch man like you don't want to you know you don't want to i'll play a song for you sure but you don't want to be a snitch you know what i mean like like somebody else somebody else's career is involved and you talk leave the names out we don't care their initials were ut okay so this is a this is like this was this was that [ __ ] got dark really fast on this one we were on tour with a band uh that i shall that shall remain nameless who who we liked we were friendly with and they were very different from us you know different state opposites like very much different but we we liked each other and i i had a soft spot for them and we were at a famous rock club in virginia that had uh like a world renowned mural right and if you were good enough and you were nice you got invited to sign the mural right and it was supervised because there were names on there clapton members of the beatles like really like it was like a really big deal um and wherever we go we try hard and have failed sometimes to be the band that everyone is glad showed up no matter how many people show up or how many tickets sellers are glad they were with us so we were having a great night you know and um we got invited to sign the wall and we just all four members at the time we walk in and we take our little sharpie that was given to us and pointed out you know to us where we should sign and we signed a little our little tags and we were grateful and we walked away and about 20 minutes later we hear this like shouting like ruckus cussing and throwing like just just something's going horrible is going on backstage and we were loading out we were getting into the trailer and the dudes in the band who we were with had got the wrong information about signing the wall and they tagged the whole thing with spray paint across their whole logo across this ancient mural of signatures and obscured like like maybe paul mccartney say like really like and it went so south so fast and nobody saw it coming it was like it was like january 6th right it was like what the [ __ ] is going on here like how did how did this happen and and nobody could explain it away nobody could like make nice like the hostility was so strong and so vicious and we had to kind of hightail it out of there even though we had weren't responsible directly we it was like whoa like i thought we might get killed wow that was bad ultimately did they uh did they tag over your signature i never found that out i walked back in i walked back in and saw what had because it was so big and so red and white and black and just it was dripping down this mural that had like an artist's rendering of like janice joplin that it was it was forget it man it was rock and roll like like you know monument and it was totally defaced it was totally defaced with exterior [ __ ] krylon spray like really like you'll never get this off this is a catastrophe okay you might you might have just stopped to mix one week later that's wow you won the worst news story yeah it fits right in bro

oh yo before you said you would play us a song would you play as a song for you oh yeah yeah what do you want to hear i'll go get a guitar hang on think about it all right i'll ask the crowd

what do you guys want to hear i've blocked all my stuff i guess i don't need to by the way natalie's not here because i wouldn't want to guilt him but like holy crap i i weaseled my way into this episode because i'm such a big fan of his and they stayed up late and he gave me zero points i never say that to him now that joe that is the worst yeah it fits right in that's how i win right wait what'd you win oh we were just deciding that because i got zero points that made me the winner what is the worst right it's like it is the worst exactly it's like a reverse episode joe so in actuality you actually won uh canada is bizarro u.s so i guess so canada we're playing a rush cover on on this tour by the way we're playing i'm not going to say which one but it's like it's really scary you can get up there and do that that getty lee voice you've heard of that

i'm just seeing what uh we'll see i'm asking the people here yeah

i guess just go with dirtbag oh that's the consensus is it yeah it seems i'm fine with that

okay i'm kind of in tune okay here we go her name is noel and i have a dream about her she rings my bell i got you in class and half an hour oh how she rocks being kids and tube socks but she doesn't know who i am and she doesn't give a damn about me cause i'm just a teenage dirtbag baby yeah i'm just a teenage dirtbag baby listen to iron maiden baby

is the mix okay is everything coming through all right good i realize i left my headphones on for this and they're closer to my face so you might be getting like acapella her boyfriend's a dick and he brings a gun to school and he'd simply kick my ass if he knew the truth he lives on my block and he drives in iraq but he doesn't know who i am and he doesn't give a all about me cause i'm just a teenage dirtbag baby yeah i'm just a teenage dirt bag baby listen to iron maiden baby with me

oh yeah

no she doesn't know what she's missing oh yeah dirtbag you know she doesn't know what she's missing

man i feel like mold it's prom night and

she's walking over to me this must be fake my lips starts to shake and how does she know who i am

and why does she give a damn oh about me

she said i got tickets to iron maiden baby come with me friday don't say maybe i'm just a teenager back baby like you oh

oh yeah

no she doesn't know what she's

missing

[ __ ] awesome man oh that was great give me goosebumps like my hair on the back of my neck i can't wait to see that i think matter of fact i just looked it up the summerland tour i will be at that's your first show boston looks july 2nd is in middletown new york all right so there's there was one added actually in boston

yeah yeah yeah all right i might i might have just i might just let the cat out of the bag well that's okay so you guys will have practice before you get to us so that's good yeah yeah atlantic city all right all right man yeah awesome but i can't wait to see it man dude you were a fantastic judge please come back any time any time like it's cool to get somebody that kind of gets the game and kind of gets into it and uh you know knows things about the different decades and and can tell their experiences i think you did a fantastic job so please so good anytime you want to come back or if we like whatever just come back anything you guys need this was fun it's it's always fun to bump into you know our type of people so yeah um any anything you need from us moving forward we love you guys and we'll be there all right great man this will be out next wednesday and uh if i don't talk to you and i it's been matt that i've been talking to yeah you can get myself from him that's all good you know all right cool and uh i'll send you all the promo stuff and i'll see you in like a month yeah definitely oh wow this is i can't believe we're doing this it dude it's crazy it is so crazy it's i cannot believe it's almost june but yeah i'll like a month from now see you yeah absolutely we'll be safe guys all right so lock yourself out of the house

it happens man you know you know yeah well thanks for having me on i really appreciate it all right cheers thanks again i'll wait i'll wait for the recording and you know sometimes i don't log off right away because i've done that and screwed it up for people so go ahead mark you could do your clothes out yeah all right well unfortunately we're gonna have to end this episode right here but if you've missed an episode don't worry you can always go over to duelingdecades.com where you can subscribe to the show they're on your platform of choice please remember to like subscribe and to review our shows and remember hit the notifications button and the bell on youtube so until next time jewelers we're gonna bid you a peace love light and a joy have a grateful week everyone